Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Last week of clinical at TTSH. I was doing portable today...... the portables were never ending... everytime when we thought we have done all the requests,,, there are more waiting for us in the department. Had practices on a few abdomen,,,,, but none to my satisfactory.... i really have problem doing port abdomen.... the subjects are usually rather heavy and less mobile... so knowing me..... so skinny and lack of strength.... having very difficult time.... so sorry for my mentor.... hope tomorrow i got a prefect abdomen for my completency.

I really dun understand why pple are so damn scared of radiation. Even though they are health care workers too. They just ran far far away,,, and leave us to move the subjects and stuff,,,, things would be so much easier if we have more helping hands and not stares....... They can hide all they want after helping us.... not as if we dun give time for them to run to safety. If they are really that scared, then dun request portables in the wards lor... at least they can be spared of being "fried" ....this is so damn ridiculous.

The minute i went back home, i managed to catch a good one hour nap. still panda eyes though. =P

12:30 PM
Caris

Monday, June 27, 2005

spent my sunday retyping the last five reports. finally completed the task in the evening.

Now have to start gathering information for my case study...... well it's all about work, work and more work. I really need a break ..... think have to wait for half a year more manz... this is so damn tiring.... i need some changes in my life.... study and exams are no fun .. however, i need to go through all these at least through the degree as well. I am burning out.... symptoms are pretty obvious... i got frustrated easily, bad mood swing... and other stuff.... need to realease off the pressure.

maybe xc says is true... i need to exercise liao....... in relax mode for too long =)

11:50 AM
Caris

Sunday, June 26, 2005

spent the entire morning and afternoon doing project. We have decided to make a new board with smaller dimensions. Got started in the afternoon at dad's factory.

today, it seems like i wasn't really co operative as i was not proactive to ask around for equipments and stuff. In fact, it was FL who was asking and finding gadgets to do the stuff. Dad was not around...i was not comfortable to ask my uncle and his workers to do something out of their job scope. hee hee think me and my stupid principle.

I was very tired and sleepy since i had already lost sleep for a good two months. Dunno what's the reasons ... now i am wide awake here updating my blog... hmm this was so strange.

I was also thinking about the perfectionist stuff... thought i have already thrown that side of me out of my life long long time ago. ever since secondary three when i started to decline in my performances in studies. From then, i had told myself that it is absolutely alright for me not to do well and maintain my class position... A pass for every examination was everything i asked for then. gone were the days when i must get distinctions for every subjects. Am i happy in my life when i have stopped being a perfectionist? well, at least i can joke about myself and enjoy life more than i used to. maybe i still display such trait but in a more subtle mode =P

11:59 AM
Caris

Saturday, June 25, 2005

went for the swan lake performance today. It was pretty good but was only considered good lor .. not excellent. The orchestra was not really up to standard. Some of the portions, i could actually heard some instrutments going out of tune. But these were some minor faults. Overall 4 stars.

As usual, i fell alseep once again when Act 2 was up. I just could not endure that slow moving music. Although i have tried very hard not to close my eye lids, they just refused. Bin n xy were laughing at me. But i cannot help me. Both of them kept saying that i missed the best part of the ballet. Ha ha .... but i still cannot cure my sleepiness for swan lake Act 2. For the rest of the acts, i was wide awake. Hee hee.

Last day over at CGH. someone says i need to be more cheerful. how? my bittergroud face. =P

2:59 PM
Caris

Monday, June 20, 2005

my pc was infected by worms for almost 4 days. Finally, managed to get it up and running. I was not very sure if the operation was successful so i am now keeping my fingers crossed and pray hard that i have get rid of the intruders.

How was it without PC? Well, I kinda enjoy it. I get more time to read over the books i got from the library two weeks ago. This would not happen if my pc was up and running coz i will be busy msning and surfing internet. It was frustrated. yes it was pretty bad especially when there is a 2500 plus words case study to be completed withing these two weeks plus producing reports and stuff. This was actually a very bad time for it to fall "sick". I got lots of scoldings from elder bro and mummy though. One nags over the installation and antispyware issues the latter did not understand why i can just leave the PC like that.. and went out to attend gatherings with my friends. =P

Spent my sat evening with secondary friends. Went over to ed's place and help one of the marriage couple and sharing sessions too lah. Hee Hee...... realised that planning of honeymoon locations can also caused a lot of conflicts. Troublesome lor. wonder what will happen to me manz when it is my turn. ha ha ...

1:40 PM
Caris

Monday, June 13, 2005

It seems to me that i have wasted another sunday. I still waiting for the "motivation" to start writing my three reports. I have only completed 6 experience reports and 4 procedure reports so day, which means i have another 11 more to cover for the remaining three weeks clinical attachment and next sem 11 weeks clinical. Oh still have one outstanind stage B skull xray to complete from last year. =P Think the progess is in good timeline. thus no need to stress myself too much over that. Just need to start the engine and maintained the steam to tide through the remaining three weeks. ... Looking forward to swan lake on the 24th June 2005 though (",)

watch a new anime called" Blue Submarine". I shall furnish the details later. hee hee

I just enjoy moments when i am alone at home. With no disturbance and distraction. No restriction of any what so ever. Peace and freedom. Wonder when i can have a house of my own so that i can have some personal space.

7:25 AM
Caris

Sunday, June 12, 2005

had a bath after returning home from Jean & Jason wedding bash at my secret garden.......

It's a cool wedding bash with live band performing of course compliments by clifford and gang (forgot the band name =P) sorry brudder, I was not very sober at the moment. Didn't really drink a lot. Down one glass of beer and some red wine from maureen.

The food was good. I love the raisin rice and broccoli and mushroom. Delicious!. Good food and good music coupled with nice ambience.

The crowd become rowdy towards the night coz everyone has been drinking too much alcohol. Jason's friends make him drink red wine till he knocked out. In the end, they had to send him home first at around 11 plus. After Jason, it is Jean's turn coz TT staff all toasting to her. When i got back to her, she was already very high. Funny thing is that she knows she cannot drink anymore, but she still continue drinking with cliff, andrew and edwin helping her out. I wanted to help but i was feeling a bit dizzy after several round of red wine too and rash are developing. Priority was to remain sober so that can take care of her later till her friends came back for her. When her friends got back,she was already drunk. Andrew still ordered some more wine. Oh my god, i wanted to told him off and he still ask Mitch and I to help out. Okie lah.. later he realised that Jean cannot take it anymore, he still helped to cover her up and tell pple that she cannnot drink anymore. =)

I just dun understand why must make bride and groom drunk like that. I dun even like the sight of pple forcing each other to bottom up. Dun find it fun at all. At times, i do want to know what it is like to be drunk but sometimes i just dun like the feeling of being sick and suffered from hangover the next day .

5:30 PM
Caris

被风吹过的下夏天

演唱：林俊杰/金莎
词：冯欣慧 曲：林俊杰

还 记得昨天 那个夏天
still remember yesterday that particular summer
微风吹过的一瞬间
the very moment the light breezes blew past
似乎吹翻一切
it seems like topples every thing
只剩寂寞肯沉淀
leaving behind loneliness.

如今 风依旧在追
And now wind are still giving chase
秋天的雨跟随
Autumn's Rain follows
心中的热却不退
passon of the heart still prevails
仿佛继续闭着双眼
continue to close both eyes
熟悉的脸 又会浮现 在眼前
familiar face appears in my eyes again

蓝色的思念
Blue memories
突然演变成了 阳光的夏天
Suddenly turned into sunny summer
空气中的温暖 不会很遥远
warmth in the air is not that far away
冬天也仿佛 不再留恋
does not seem to long for winter anymore

绿色的思念
Green memories
挥手对我说一声'四季不变
wave its hand and say to me " Four seasons won't change"
不过一季的时间
just one season time
又再回到从前
it will return back just like the past
那个被风吹过的夏天
that summer which was blown away by the wind

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This is the latest duet mandarin song i fancy. Not sure if i have translated it correctly in english hee hee . Pardon me for my lousy translation skill. =P

4:15 AM
Caris

Saturday, June 11, 2005
It's another peaceful friday night. Went to NUH to collect the casenotes for my casestudy only to find that it is one of the "lucky" ones for audit. Dunno when they can release for review. Sigh. well at least Farjihan got hers =)

Since we were already at NUH, we went to pay the DI department a visit at the same time to settle some issues. Again, the person i am looking for is on night shift. No wonder Jeff says he did not see him around. (finally your name is on my blog. Happie =P) well, another trip to NUH next weekend then. what to do ?

collected Barium meal follow through today. That clocked my third report for the week and i have not started on any yet. Oh my! weekend is going to be burnt with report writing and Jean's wedding bash.

2:59 AM
Caris

Thursday, June 09, 2005

i am still suffering from sleepless nights. The active mind of mine just refused to rest throughout the night and i am wondering why. The worst thing is i cannot remember the dreams i dreamt and have not recollection if they are the same ones or not.

how do i get myself to sleep like i used to?

2:55 PM
Caris

Monday, June 06, 2005

Elder Brother had injured his right palm during his night cycling activity. He was like why mum must remind him to bring plasters in case of injuries. Ha ha . this is a classical example of superstition. Dun u think so? I dun like pple to remind me of something which i will normally bring along during a trip. It serves more like a sign in fact a bad omen. poor mum... her concern... become a "curse"... But of course, my bro did not blame her for that.

1:06 PM
Caris

Sunday, June 05, 2005

Bought many stuff today.
1. Esprit Belt ( dunno why but i know i need one)
2. Guide to Radiological Procedures (finally and thanks to leen for that)
3. Collected my spectables which i dun really like tell u why later.

On the way to buy the book at novena research books, I bought the belt. Hee hee there was a sale so decided to get since i need one. No regrets.

As for my spectables, i actually wanted a more fashionable design. As usual, went with my mum the other to choose the spectables. The problem with choosing spectables is that there is no way one can see clearly if the design suits u or not. At that instances, surrounding turned blurry and the image appeared in the mirror looks forever "good" during the trial. Things always turned out this way for me. After several occassions, i still making the same mistakes of bringing my mum along as my consultant or rather my "eyes". They look pretty alright on me just that i think there should be a more suitable one for me.. and i should not have rush to get one.

After dinner, watch a jap movie on channel 56. It is about police force and what differences could a good leader be in the force in fact it applies to all organisations across the board. However, it is typical japanese style. The bad example leader was portrayed by a female. =P She was very strict and go by the book. She dun trust her staff and every thing is pretty rigid. In the end, due to her undecisiveness, one of the officer was wounded. Then the guy took over the command, he put his trust and he believed in his officers under him. He allowed them to exercise their initiations and power to carry tasks which they are capable of or trained for. Guess the real corporate world worked in this way as well. Wonder how is my future boss? hee hee

2:59 PM
Caris

Saturday, June 04, 2005

After about two years of maintaining this long distance relationship, they have finally tied the knot today. Although it was just a small celebration at the KTV in safra, i think the couples felt happy. I was glad that her sis managed to attend the celebration. this meant so much to her. =)

I have known this little sister of mine for nearly 3 to 4 years. Beside the fact that we are bonded by IJ, something within us just happen to click and become close friends. Guess we are similar in certain areas of life. may be. She has been through a lot in order to maintain this relationship with Fei. I remember when they first got together, everyone was pretty skeptical about this relationship. Many pple were worried over her. She has always been lucky coz she always met many elders and good friends who adore her and even protect her. =) I was also worried but since she was very confident that she has found the "one". I will give her my blessing. Anyway, Fei really love her. So he better take good care of my little sister. If not, he will get it from me... ha ha.

All the best mitch. happpiness is in your own hands. U have to create it and treasure it. Never take it for granted. Your sister here will always be there for you (",)

2:59 PM
Caris

Friday, June 03, 2005

I went down NUH to submit my enema report to ana. I was lost coz i dun know the way to AnE x ray department. So i went to the main department at level 2 and ask for directions. In the end, i am still lost hee hee ...... finally found my way there..... he's very nice..

Then rushed to school for project meeting. Okie lah, at least this time we managed to get something out of the cassette holder design. unlike last time where we would just stop and dun bother about that. always leaving it for the next time. guess that is because we are really behind schedule. That means that i need to replan the timeline again. well, there are also some internal issues which need to settle or rather talk it out among the group members. Guess if we dun voice out our thoughts, things will get worse lor.. and it will be better if things are ironed out and misunderstandings will to be resolved then we shall move on to the next phrase in harmony. Not that we quarrelled or something,, but frustration are gradually building up and it does not help with the rush of completing experience reports and procedure reports. Everyone is feeling the stress and stuff thus will naturally become short temper and sort of loss our usual clamness and tolerance will also be affected. ( i also have my shares) I roughly understand what's going on with the group.. but just that i now sure which approach to use... and hope so far i have not screwed up any yet. =P

1:46 PM
Caris

Thursday, June 02, 2005

met up with chen chen, he jia and bin for dinner as a reunion to mark one year anniversary for the trip to mount kinabalu. times really flies manz .

well, think there is some internal issues for the FYP which needs to facilitate some mediation. This can be a but tricky ... shall see how lah.. too tired to think tonight...

finally completed my barium enema report ,, =)

2:59 PM
Caris

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

guess who i saw on TV just now........ it's him. someone i known during my JC days.

2:59 PM
Caris

I could not think of any reasons why i still suffer from sleepless nights during the holidays. I should be in the most relax modes and not so stressful over the clinical attachments. Well, it seems like I am pretty much bother about clinicals. Wonder is it because i still have one outstanding barium enema report to be submitted. Fine i better settle that report asap so that i can sleep well once again. Somehow, i dun think that is the main issue. Dun think it is work related. Oh no! need to do some emotional balancing act again. One of those days hee hee.
Project went on pretty well today. We tested out the new prototype. It seems feasible. Well, let
's hope for the best i guess.
Supposed to meet PAT folks at fisherman tonight. but i could not join them again due to report. Andrew is leaving TT. so this is a celebration for him. anyway i will be seeing them again on Friday for Mitch's wedding. Looking forward to see the full forces again. which means i have to see CS ... ha ha...

2:20 PM
Caris